Tongue Tied, Don't Know What to Say?

Fall is settling in across the South Sound. We’ve had rain, lightning storms and the leaves are starting to go from green to red and yellow. Another thing I’ve noticed lately is how frequently I’m receiving calls or having conversations with people who are telling me bad, sad or scary news about their lives. Although it’s normal for me to hear this type of news (in my line of work and all, it’s only to be expected) it’s still hard to know what to say and lately it seems really frequent. While this is a tough topic to think about & talk about, it’s so important! It doesn’t matter who you are or who you know, it will happen. Lately I pulled out my copy of, “There is no Good Card for This” by Kelsey Crowe, PhD and Emily McDowell and compiled the thoughts below from my reading and my work experiences.

We’re all going to be face to face with a person who’s just lost a family member, been diagnosed with a scary illness, is getting divorced, has lost their job, or one of so many other things.  And guess what?  When you are looking the person in the eye, or hearing their sadness over the phone, it might feel impossible to say the right thing. One problem with this is that then some of us delay saying anything and/or even avoid the person who is going through the hard time. And one of the hardest issues people face when bad things happen to them is fearing that they will be avoided, treated differently, or left out of others’ lives in addition to struggling through the hard thing they are dealing with.

People often avoid the person who is hurting because:

1. They are afraid of doing the wrong thing;

2. They are afraid of saying the wrong thing; &

3. They are worried they don’t have enough time to give the person proper attention.

The good news is that no one is perfect, everyone makes mistakes and most people make this whole thing harder than it needs to be. When someone is dealing with loss or pain, they are usually dealing with other losses, too-it could be their identity, their main companion, their community, their confidence or even their financial security. They could be overwhelmed and may not even know what they need. Which is why it’s important to reach out and offer support, help, love, and kindness even if you’re scared you’ll do it wrong. You might say the wrong thing but letting the person you know you care (even awkwardly) is better than not reaching out.

Things to keep in mind when reaching out: be kind, don’t pity, listen as a form of caring and understand that you don’t need to offer a solution (because you can’t solve the problem). When you’re not sure what to say, “I’m sorry,” or “How are you doing?” are solid ways to start. If you have had a similar experience, acknowledging that you’ve been through something similar might help to make the person feel like they’re not alone, so long as you don’t turn the conversation to your experience. You’re there for support, not to talk about you.  

If you aren’t sure how to reach out, do what you can. If you see someone in person, say something. If you can call, pick up the phone. If that doesn’t feel right or you are scared, e-mail, text, message via social media. Even small gestures let someone know you are thinking of them. Send a card in the mail, leave flowers or a little gift. Rather than asking how you can help, offering something you’re able to do or give that you know would be helpful in some way (cooking, driving a kid to school or practice, feeding the pets, helping with a work project) may actually help the person more and take pressure off them.  When you’re struggling, you often have no idea how someone could help you.  It’s ok if it isn’t perfect and it’s ok if you put your foot in your mouth.

There’s so much more help in the book, and I would recommend it to everyone. If you want more depth and detail, I’d suggest reading the whole book. Again, it is “There is no Good Card for This” by Kelsey Crowe, PhD and Emily McDowell. Hope this compilation and my thoughts help you, too. As always, if I can help you or answer questions, shoot me an email.

It's National Dog Day, do you have a plan for your pets?

It’s National Dog Day, and also the dog days of summer, which raises an interesting estate planning topic: what happens to your dog (or cat, pig, rat...) if something happens to you?

Washington law considers animals and pets to be your personal property, which means you get to decide who should receive them at your death.  You’ve got a few options when it comes to deciding where your pet should go if something happens to you.

The simplest and most common way to plan for your pet is to name them on a list of personal property and state who should receive them.  In Washington, you are permitted to make a list of personal property items and designate to whom each item should be given at your death. As long as this list is signed and dated by you and kept in a place where it can be found, it will be honored and the items on your list will be distributed to the people you listed first, before the rest of your estate is distributed under your will.  These lists are great for sentimental items, things you can see and touch and also your pets. Note: they do not work for money, bank accounts, stock, real estate, financial accounts, etc. This means that while you can list who should receive your puppy if you pass, you can’t use the list to give the person taking your dog a monetary gift to help out with care.  If that’s not a concern, the list will work fine.  If you don’t have a personal property list like this but would like one, email or message us at: hello@kampbell-law.com and we’ll send one to you.

If you not only want to say who your pet should live with but also provide instructions or funds from your estate to help fund care for your pet, it’s better to put this information in your will.  We would call this a specific bequest and you would be able to name who should receive your pet and make a monetary gift to that person to help with your pet’s ongoing care and expenses.

If you want to go a further step and require specific types of care, certain things that should be paid for for your pet’s care on an ongoing basis, then you may want to set up a trust for your pet. A trust names someone to care for your pet and manage funds to be used for your pet.  It also creates a plan for who (or what organization) should receive any remaining funds at the eventual death of your pet.

At Kampbell Legal Planning, we’re all about planning for what matters most to you. If your pets are your life or an important part of your family, then we can make sure they will be safe and sound no matter what. Have questions about this? Give us a call (253) 564.2088 or email us: hello@kampbell-law.com

Trust Issues, Got Any?

Have you ever been told that you should have a trust and wondered what the heck that meant? I meet with clients almost every day who ask me whether they should have a trust instead of a will and here’s what I tell them: “it depends”.  I know, I know, that’s such a lawyerly answer, but it’s the truth.  For some people, a trust is the best fit and for some, a will works just fine.  So, why would you consider using a trust instead of just a will?

Let’s start with the basics: wills and trusts both serve to transfer your assets to your loved ones after you have passed away.  A will is not effective while you are alive, but at death, it springs to life and names who should be in charge of settling your estate (the executor) and who (beneficiaries) should receive your assets (money, investments, real estate, etc.).  A trust will perform the same basic functions at death since it also names who should be in charge (successor trustee) and who should receive the trust assets (beneficiaries).  The difference is that a trust only governs those assets that are titled in the name of the trust and it is effective during your lifetime.  This means that in order for your trust to be effective you actually have to retitle assets into it (i.e. rename applicable financial accounts, transfer real estate, etc.) while you are alive.  Now while this requires a little work up-front, it’s not too difficult a task as long as you remain diligent.

So why would you do this? One big benefit of utilizing the trust structure is that a correctly funded trust will allow your estate to avoid the probate process.  I am sure you have heard horror stories about probate, since pretty much every client I meet groans out loud at the mere mention of the word.  While Washington has a fairly straight-forward probate system, it does still require a trip to court, a waiting period before assets can be transferred, and attorney fees.  While I personally don’t mind the process, it certainly doesn’t hurt to avoid it.

If you own real estate in more than one state, I 100% recommend setting up a trust.  Each state has jurisdiction over the property within its bounds, which means that if you die and own property in two states, there will be a probate here in Washington and then another (ancillary) probate in each other state where you own real property.  In this case, a trust will significantly save your estate when it comes to attorney fees and court costs.

Trusts are also a great way to organize your estate and make it easier for the successor trustee and your beneficiaries when it comes time to settle everything up.  Because you need to fund your trust during life, it typically means that you have a clearer picture of assets that you own, how they are titled, and perhaps even a current list with helpful information that you can then leave for your successor trustee.  Well-organized estates are less likely to deal with beneficiary issues or problems because there is less ambiguity.

Whether you need a trust is a good question to ask your lawyer, but the bottom-line and my favorite soapbox is that regardless of whether a trust or a will is better for your situation, having one is very important.  A large part of the population has no estate planning in place and let me tell you, estates without planning are no fun.  But that’s a topic for another time.

Community Property Law

In your line of work, do you have questions that just come up over and over again? Well I sure do and one of the questions that comes up most around the old conference table is: “Why the heck do we need a Community Property Agreement when we live in Washington and Washington is a community property state?” Such a good question and so often asked with the sarcasm that only comes from a client thinking that they know more about the law than the attorney they just hired to help them. But I digress.  Community property is one of the most commonly misunderstood topics and so I thought I would break it down here.

1.            Washington is a community property state, what does that mean?  Essentially, Washington’s identification as a community property state means that in Washington, if you are married, there is a presumption that anything that you earn during the marriage is “community property”.  Notice the word “earn.” The presumption of community property does not extend to any assets you owned prior to marriage, nor does it include gifts or inheritances that you receive during marriage, those items are presumed to be your separate property.  However, if you take assets that are presumed separate property and “commingle” them with your community assets so that they lose their separate character, then you may have inadvertently transformed them into community property.  Now this is a very basic statement of the law in Washington, so understand that the topic can be much more complicated and nuanced, but this is it in a nutshell.

2.            What is Community Property?  When something is owned between spouses as community property, it means that asset is owned in 50/50 undivided shares by both spouses.  Neither spouse controls the whole asset.  Conversely, separate property is owned 100% by the one spouse and not jointly by both.

3.            What happens to community property when one spouse dies?  Here’s where things start to get complicated because there are three main possible scenarios that could apply: (a) Deceased Spouse has no will, (b) Deceased Spouse has a will; and/or (c) Deceased Spouse has a community property agreement.  The answer is different in each scenario.

                First, if there is no will or community property agreement and one spouse dies, RCW 11.04.015 states how the estate will pass.  Basically, 100% of the community property and a portion of the separate property (depending on if the deceased spouse has children or other heirs).  However, a probate will most likely be necessary to transfer everything over to the surviving spouse, even if most everything was community property if there is real estate or more than $100,000 of assets in Deceased Spouse’s estate.

                In the second scenario where Deceased Spouse has a will, Deceased Spouse can leave his or her half of the community property to whomever he or she wishes (but only his or her half) and the same goes for separate property.  Here again though, if real estate or more than $100,000 of financial assets are part of Deceased Spouse’s estate, it is likely that a probate will need to be opened to transfer assets to the surviving spouse and/or other beneficiaries.  Most people do not know this and assume that no probate is ever necessary when there is a surviving spouse.  This is tough news to break to clients who are already going through the worst time.

                In the event that a spouse dies but the spouses had a community property agreement between them, it means that (if the estate is not taxable and there aren’t other legal considerations we need to worry about) we can record the community property agreement in every county in which the spouses own real estate and the Agreement will serve to memorialize that everything belonging to Deceased Spouse should pass to Surviving Spouse. No probate is necessary under this scenario.  See why you may want to have a community property agreement?

Now it’s important to emphatically emphasize (like what I did there?) that community property agreements (like all estate planning tools) are not right for every person or situation.   But if you are married and your estate is not estate- taxable it is something that you should discuss with your attorney to find out if it would be a good fit for you.

As always, I love answering questions, so ask away if you have any.  This article does not constitute legal advice and is meant to provide basic level information about a very commonly misunderstood topic that every married person in Washington actually needs to know about. 

Tuesday Tips (Summer Edition) Leaving on a Jet Plane? 10 Ways to Prepare for your Trip

It’s summer here in the South Sound, although you would barely know it by looking out the window.  It feels more like what I’ve decided to refer to as “early fall.”  All the more reason to take off for a sunny vacation, check out of your real life and get some real relaxation.  My family’s getting ready for our summer holiday and it’s got me thinking about what’s important to do before leaving for that little break.  Here are my top 10 best ways to prepare and get the most out of my time away:

1.            Pack a Copy of Important Documents: your passport, driver’s license, travel itinerary, credit card and medical documents (like Power of Attorney and Health Care Directive) and pack them in a compartment of your suitcase or save them electronically.  If you lose your actual documents, the copies will help.

2.            Set an Email Auto Response: Nothing ruins vacation more than feeling stuck to your phone or computer.  Using an automatic response to let people know you are away, what your access to email will be like and who they should contact in your absence is one of the best ways I know to be able to actually RELAX when you are away.  Then if an emergency comes up that you need to deal with, it will be the exception, not the rule on your trip.

3.            Set your House up for Success:

                Unplug any electronics possible (they still use energy even when you aren’t using them);

                Give your fridge a little cleaning out;

                Put your lights on a timer so your dark house doesn’t attract the wrong kind of attention;

                Set your thermostat to save energy; and

                Clean your house so you can return to one that feels good.

4.            Stop Your Mail: (or make other arrangements for it to be picked up regularly). Identity theft is no fun!

5.            Tell your Bank you are Leaving: You can usually find the right phone number on the back of your debit or credit card.  Doing this will ensure that you’ll continue to be able to access your funds.

6.            Pay your Bills: Make sure you pay any bills that will be due while you are away.

7.            Charge Electronics: Pre-charge all your devices so they are ready to go when you need them on the plane. AND DON’T FORGET CHARGERS.

8.            Bring Plenty of Sunscreen: I’ve found that it’s usually more cost effective to buy sunscreen at home and pack it with me than buy it in tropical locations. Plus, you want to be able to hit the beach or pool right away.

9.            Check the Weather: I’ve been surprised before-make sure you are prepared by checking the weather before you pack.

10.          Prepare for Lost Luggage:  It’s no fun, but if you have a change of clothes and your essentials in your carry-on bag, you’ll survive in the event your luggage isn’t waiting for you on the other side. I always put a swimsuit, change of clothes and my makeup in my bag that I carry on. It will still be annoying, but it’s way better with a few essentials.

Bonus Tip:  Make a list of everything you need to bring (I do mine on the computer so I can reuse it every time with tweaks for the specific trip) with check boxes.  Then go one by one and check all the boxes. You’ll be as prepared as possible and less stressed than if you are trying to create the list in your head.

None of these tips are rocket science, but they are good reminders as you get ready to check out of real life for a while.  Hope they help you and I’m wishing you a wonderful vacation.

Tuesday Tips (Summer Edition) - If You Own an 18 Year Old You Need This

Summer is all about barbeques, summer camps, long days and evenings and getting out and enjoying the beauty that is so unique to the Pacific Northwest.  I also know a lot of families that are preparing to send their child off to college for the first time.  Something that often gets overlooked is the fact that once a child turns 18, he or she is considered to be an adult and parents no longer have the automatic right to make decisions, sign documents and access health records that they did when their child was a minor.  I know from talking to clients how easy it is to forget that 18 year olds are adults in the eyes of the law.

If you are out shopping for dorm supplies and filling out college paperwork this summer, there’s something else you should add to your list (I know, I’m sure it’s already long): having a Power of Attorney prepared for your child so that if anything happened, you would be able to immediately step in and have access to health records, speak to doctors, make health related decisions and also assist your child in any other legal way necessary.

What is a Power of Attorney? In Washington, a Durable Power of Attorney allows you to name someone else to make important health and financial/legal decisions in the event that you are alive but not capable of making decisions for yourself.  When your child is still a young adult, attending college, perhaps needing help with banking, paying bills and other matters from you, a Durable Power of Attorney is probably going to be necessary to allow you to help.  If your child has a medical situation arise, you want to be able to immediately get involved, have access to his or her medical information, make treatment decisions, etc. and you won’t want to be turned away because you don’t have the proper documentation.   

These documents can be revoked or terminated at any time by your child as they get older, but in the meantime, it could mean peace of mind and the ability to smoothly handle any situation that arises.  If you have any questions about powers of attorney or you would like us to help you put one in place, we are happy to discuss. 

Tuesday Tips (Summer Edition) - Medical Treatment Authorizations for kids

It’s summer in the PNW (even though the view from my window is currently revealing rain.) Kids are out of school and that means they are doing a whole bunch of other activities, spending time with friends, sleeping over & visiting other family members, and attending all kinds of camps. In the summer chaos, its easy to forget important details and this is something that’s been on my mind lately. As a lawyer and a mom I try to be prepared and make sure that my kids are safe no matter where they are. One piece of the puzzle is making sure that someone who is with your child is authorized to seek medical treatment for your child if any medical issue or injury occurs. Personally I hate thinking about this, but if I could not be reached and my child was injured or needing medical attention, I would not want assistance to be slowed down just because there was no one around with authority to consent to treat my child.

In light of that, I’ve created a super simple and straight-forward medical treatment authorization and consent form that I use when my kids are going to be with other adults. I fill this form out with all of our contact information, doctor & dentist, and insurance information and make a stack of copies. Then when I need to give one of these forms out I only need to fill in the name of the adult I am authorizing to seek treatment.

My form is informal and practical and if you would like a copy for yourself, you can download mine here.

As always, if you have questions, call or email and I’ll be happy to help.

Legal Stuff (because I’m a lawyer): Please note that provision of this form does not constitute legal advice and downloading it or reading it for yourself does not create an attorney-client relationship between us. It’s simply a helpful tool that I use that you may find helpful too. Since every situation and circumstance and child is different, it’s important to remember that forms are merely a starting place and need to be customized for each particular situation. While I am happy to share this form, by downloading or reviewing it, you are acknowledging that I am not responsible or liable for your use or misuse of the form.